I have been informed that I am no longer welcome at the rituals of the coven The Ex and I have been attending. He had told me that he didn’t want to take this from me but according to the email I just received from the High Priestess this is not the case and I am no longer welcome unless he himself invites me. But I am of course welcome to continue going to her church and to continue paying my membership pledge. Not much incentive there seeing as how she didn’t offer me any support for the loss of a friend and a relationship all in 3 weeks. But my $300 is MORE then welcome. uh huh.
update: I am welcome any time The Ex decides to invite me. But even if we are friends I still need to be invited by him specifically. That made me feel really good. Especially after I just pledged to her church. I give $300 a year there, that must be why. I just rescinded my membership and pledge and told her that sending me that email now? when there isn’t a ritual until Ostara? Knowing that there had been a death in the family too? Was cruel. People can be so full of shit sometimes.
For Brutus, as you know, was Caesar’s angel.
Judge, O you gods, how dearly Caesar lov’d him!
This was the most unkindest cut of all;
For when the noble Caesar saw him stab,
Ingratitude, more strong than traitors’ arms,
Quite vanquish’d him: then burst his mighty
heart. . . .
Stitch Witch Cottage 
It seems like a trial by fire at your home. Surely you will emerge brighter and more shiny than ever.
Maybe some frank and honest communication can help the situation heal? If you can’t have honesty with your clergy, then it is perhaps time to find a new circle of worship.
I couldn’t possibly have been more open communication wise. It isn’t me who is communicating in a manner less than to be desired. She is protecting him and made that very clear. *sigh*
The best action at this time is inaction. And leaving and recinding the pledge I made Sunday. Which she should never have accepted given this message.
Oh hon, that’s horrible!! Why the hell would the HP take sides like that? Has he told them you’re violent or something?
That’s crap. It sounds like what he told you and what he told her don’t add up.
She was his friend first
Still, if you and he have truly made peace, I don’t see what she’s “protecting” him from. He pushed you away, you went. If you had broken up because you cheated on him, or abused him in some way I could understand this, but you’ve made a point of letting him walk the path that he chose for himself.
I’m staying out of it now, but I just don’t get it. I think a HP should be above taking sides in matters of a personal nature.
Agreed
I’m sorry. It sucks to be turned away from a coven. 😦
Hold up, one question for clairification:
If anyone were to walk in off the stress would they need an invitation? Do you have to know or date someone in the group to be welcomed? How does that work?
Just wondering.
Yes. You do have to be invited. Which is cool. That’s her right. It’s just that this was so badly done.
Everyone who is on the invite list is welcome to bring one friend. I had thought that they saw me as more than that considering how much I done and participated and how much interest I have showed that has had nothing to do with Patrick. I can still go. If he invites me. The days when I sit around and wait for Patrick to include me are OVER.
Wow, considering how much of yourself you put into your donations to their fundraiser (I’m guessing hours and hours of handwork), I wouldn’t have ever though you were considered the +1.
Didn’t you donate this year, and last year?
Clearly they can choose their invite list, but this sounds more like a standing dinner party than a spiritiual organization. Who has an exclusive invite list to worship?
Ah, but see she is saying I can still do Gaia’s Temple, which is who got my donations. Officially.
She is just saying I can’t come to her PRIVATE party, Moonwise, without Patrick inviting me. Two different groups, same people. But not everyone from Gaia’s Temple gets invited to Moonwise. I asked to join Moonwise and to be her student as well as pledging to Gaia’s Temple.
I find it interesting that I am only accepted in the group that gets my money. Just saying.
My work will be much appreciated elsewhere. And yes, Gaia’s Temple has made money off me for two years now. But Moonwise just got my sweet smiling face and my potluck donation. But not this year. Nope. Any of my work I sell at this point? Goes in MY pocket.
It seems very odd that your monetary offering was accepted and an oath too, but yet you are effectively excommunicated because of a change in romantic status. Outside of harm or disruption to the group composition this seems a bit paranoid – maybe something like this bit her when she was younger?
We all get the right to free will for good or for harm. Me, I’d be free-willing my way on down the highway, withdrawing my energy and looking for bright new horizons, but I am a strong individualist. I think there was this meme that called me brutal at love endings (it’s true), so my feelings may have no relevance to your situation. But for me, wasting any more thought or energy here would mean that I am not progressing.
They did not leave an open door that valued who you were for an individal. Who needs *that*? My value doesn’t lie in my spouse. My idea of worship is more about giving to others in need. Everyone needs compassion, and the world is full of those in need of little miracles and magical blessings. I think being an agent of miracle is a blessed state.
Love that! Freewilling my way on down the highway. Sister, I am so with you. Got boots will travel. You are so right. I had thought it might be worth the energy and stuff to be friends with Patrick after we’ve licked our wounds but the Universe is making it abundantly clear that I am not supposed to be there but somewhere else entirely.
And you are right about giving to others in need. I had thought I had found a MINISTRY. They aren’t here for me in my pain, only those they choose. Very selective.
So. You are right. I’m freewilling it down the highway. I just LOVE that. Makes me laugh and I think it is my new mantra for now.
I guess you can tell I won’t be at Ursulmas but I still very much want to meet you. Any chance of wrangling a weekend and go to Mill Ends and lunch and just gab about everything?
I’m sad that you are not coming to Ursulmas and leaving the SCA behind :,{ but I’d love to do Mill End/fabric fondling and lunch! You do know about the Pendleton store in Washougal that does wool fer cheep?
When the going gets tough the tough go fabric shopping:p
I am pretty much speechless
I haven’t been on my friends pages for most of the week (was at the dentist and then recovering from the dentist) so I am only looking at this now (and you won’t see it for days I am thinking).
Wow. Well good thing you found this out before you put in any more time energy or money.
That sucks.