I”m on Vacation

A brief but much needed vacation.  I turn 49 on the 4th and celebrate 13 years of sobriety tomorrow.  I take as much of this week as possible to do some puttering, some nesting, some reflection, and in the case of this past year and a half, perhaps the only vacation I’ve had that hasn’t had a crisis around it, knock on wood.  Then back to work for only 14 working days before I’m on my own and hunting up fun work.

I’ve dealing with recidual breakup crap and really hope this is the last bit.  This is the only relationship ending where I am not friends with the man besides my ex-husband in 1984.  I’ve been friends with all the rest, very amiable. But none of them betrayed my like this either.  And if they had they could have admitted it instead of trying to make their betrayal something they had to do because I’m me.  So you can imagine when it cropped up again a few weeks ago, I still had some emotions tied up with that.

Combine that with the work drama and I’ve been a little sad that this crap has made it difficult for me to be fully present for this momentous new time in my life.

I hope to take these 5 days and re-group, cleanse, do some healing, some rejuvenation, and to get my focus back on track.


6 thoughts on “I”m on Vacation

  1. Hey kid! (I can call you that because I just turned 51)

    Don’t let the weasel-man’s issues spoil your holiday or this wonderful new beginning (sorry weasels, you’re nice animals really), after all, it sounds like it’s his inadequacies that are the problem and you know it in your heart.

    Congratulations for your fourth anniversary – I shall raise a cup of tea to you my dear!

    HAR! No worries, I dont’ do things that way. I pamper myself, honestly. Having a lovely shrimp salad for lunch right now, chatting with some friends online, Went shopping and got a new tarot deck and some faux suede squares. I’ll have some artsty goodness to show you all on Monday. I be a new woman, really!

  2. P.S. I saw this on Somerset Season’s blog (she’s sweet) and thought you’d like it:

    Getting On With It

    When the heart stops oozing blood
    & the outpouring is clear as water
    (so to speak) then you know you’ve
    turned the corner & will be well.
    when you look inward & all the pathways
    are no longer dark but clearly lighted
    & shine like transparent straws
    then you know you’ll find your way alone.
    When the gray morning has nothing to do
    with you & doesn’t weigh you down
    like a heavy blanket, then you know
    that moving on will be easier again and
    your body will flow through time
    like the river it really is, smooth and deep,
    no rocks, no shallows to smash or catch you,
    keep you from moving on.
    When the heart slows
    to its normal rhythm and the beauty
    of birdsong at dawn doesn’t make you cry
    because you are alone listening, then you
    know that everything has happened that is
    going to for now, and you can get on with
    your life & everything about it that was
    yours alone and always finer than
    anyone could ever imagine it would be
    without him.

    by Grace Butcher

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