The colors are coming back

Facebook, it is the Borg. I’ve been sucked in.  And I’m starting to enjoy it.  I’ve run in to some friends I haven’t seen in almost 30 years and it’s very good.  A couple of old flames too and that is extra nice.

One of them sent me this last night:

I do believe in that same force of change, and the kindness of the spirit, and connectedness and am glad to be reconnected with you. Late nights of me knocking on your door and you letting me in are in my fond memories of kindness and passion.
I wasn’t so kind back then and never believed I meant anything to anyone. I’m sorry if I ever hurt you. I always thought you were beautiful and cool though, and only remember you as nonjudgmental and accepting for who I was. So thank you for reaching out to be my friend after all these years.

I really needed that.  This fella was one of my favorite people then and I was seriously smitten with him.  I took buses to far away places to be with him.  He hit me in the head with his mic stand one night (accidentally) but he never hurt me otherwise.  And he?  Was adorably gorgeous.  Oh goodness.  I think M. and I will get to this point too and it won’t take 30 years.  We’re trying and it’s a bit awkward and bizarre at times but it’s working.  It will get better with time.

I’m sorting out stuff, working on the downsizing, making some progress but I do need to focus. It’s hard to get rid of some things and yet I’m really tired of other things.

I had a reading yesterday.  She said that The Forgiven was a catalyst (too life changing to be a test waffle) and M. was the test waffle.  And that there is another waffle coming but it will soak up lots of syrup.  Be really, really sweet.  Bring it on Baby.  She said three months but definitely before my 50th.

And that a great job is coming but mid-May. The other ones in the queue won’t be good. That money will be coming in but she doesn’t know how or from whom, but it will get me through this.

I seriously did wake up Saturday morning having heard the trumpet.  I feel so much better.  So. Much. Better.  Movement is good, focus is good, a project is good.  The folks are making space for me that will make this work out well.


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