Well, not really. Lots of rock n roll but not much country.
What I really am is a little bit New Age and all Witch. I find spiritual truths everywhere and from all religions. I use them when they mesh with my beliefs. But when it comes right down to it, I? Am a Witch. That means that that is where I find my power. That my actions with regards to life come from this center.
Last week some old stuff came up. I was upset, saw some plans going awry, thought a situation that had been handled was done. But it appears that some people (all of us?? *laugh*) need to have a couple hits before they get it. And someone, SNIB, wants to continue to live in the learning cycle of her intentions as they pertain to me.
A comment to Thursday’s (or was it Wednesday’s) post prompted this. I felt that perhaps I needed to refresh on what exactly my spiritual path is. It was very thought provoking comment. And while I can certainly see where they are coming from, I don’t agree with all of it.
I am a Witch. Period. Sure there is definitely some cross over between my witch practices and practices of other paths. But make no mistake, my solutions fall squarely into the arena of witchcraft. And that doesn’t mean, to me, just letting something be because it is the universe trying to teach me a lesson that I planned before I incarnated. I don’t believe it means I just let it be and get all warm and happy and move on and be okay with the actions of another person made on purpose with the intent to harm. It means that I have actions I need to take. That is also what I agreed before I came back this time. That I would be a Witch again because I believed that those methods are valid and they speak to me.
SNIB can see this as a teaching. HER actions have consequences. Her malignant intent has consequences. And since we both operate in the arena of Witchcraft, I will speak to her in a language she understands. In this case, banish her ass. Not for 6 months but for this lifetime certainly. She was given MANY opportunities to meet with me and to work with me in love and light. It was my first action. It is always where I go first. Believe me. I don’t work magic on another person unless all other methods have failed. She refused them all and continued on her little self absorbed path of harm to others, people she didn’t even know and refused to know. She is begging for this action, she believes she needs this lesson. Hard. My Saturn is in Capricorn and the gloves are fucking off. So Mote It Be.
What that means for me, when faced with a dilemma such as the one I’m looking at for Beltaine are these steps. I believe that ALL of these steps come from a place of my personal power. Your mileage may vary and that’s cool but just because I cry and rant it does not mean in any way that I am not centered in my power. In my opinion, the act of crying and getting rid of the intense emotions so that all actions that follow are done in calm, that is power. A lot of power.
- I get all the emotions out. Fear, anger, sadness, pain
- I get very clear on what I want to manifest, in this case, what I want to happen on Beltaine
- I begin visuallizing
- I start drafting up a ritual and the magic I wish to perform (which can include a banishing and a healing and a moving forward oh! and selling lots of pouches) which makes for a long rit needing time
- I perform magic, in this case during a waning Scorpio moon
- Hope for the best possible outcome and move on
In my scope, doing a banishing is a powerful act. Visualizing what I do want to happen is a powerful act.
I am not ashamed of being angry. I am not ashamed of doing a banishing ritual. I am certainly not ashamed of visualizing a life without SNIB. I am not so ashamed of my actions that discussion of them needs to move to private email. I can only assume that because she is in my life that we both chose this for one reason or another. I learned that my relationship with the Ex on that level was Not Working. Her actions and his showed that to me. He and I are both moving on quite well. It is good. And she is going to learn that when you set out purposely to break up a loving couple who are in turmoil there are consequences to that. When you want to take the man for your own, can’t get him, and then continue to break them up anyway? You are in serious need of a lesson. When you continue to intend harm to others, there are consequences to that.
Where am I today?
- All 12 pouches are complete and there is an immanent post with pictures of the final results
- I have 8 pairs of earrings done and plenty of time to make more for this weekend
- The metal smithing class is so awesome, I’m having a great time. I’ve learned many different ways to to solder, to create head pins with little balls of silver at the top. I’ve learned how to work a saw well. This Saturday I learn how to construct a ring. And after that I will learn rivets and hollow metal beads
- Because of how well the metalsmithing class is going I have several new of designs that will be in my next round of pouches. These will have metal central motifs that the embroidery flows around. I’m very excited about the four new designs I have and those that are coming
- I had a very nice time with my parents Saturday, dinner and a movie Amazing Grace. Sunday was mine, all mind. Art, junk food and a delicious milk shake, took a nap, and worked my fingers to exhaustion
- The sun is out after 3 days of SNOW! SNOW, 2 inches of SNOW. In Seattle. In April. There is a snowman on the lawn of a house up the street. Tres bizarre
I feel really great this morning. I accomplished a lot this weekend, I did not lose my way or get thrown off my path. I didn’t do any thinking about the episode last week with one exception. I did speak with the The Ex and we have discussed what our actions need to be in this matter. I am totally in my power and it shows.
What will I do if SNIB shows up at Beltaine? If the banishing ritual doesn’t work (it’s worked quite well before, I have hope it will, but if it doesn’t)?
I have backup plans. My display is already very sparkley. My business cards are on sparkle card stock as well as my tags. My display cloths all have silver and sparkles. My pouches and earrings all have sparkles. Who on earth will notice that sparkle powder that surrounds my display and think it is anything other than a part of my display? Not likely anyone. But that powder has a bit of a kick to it if a certain person tries to cross the line of sparkles. Pentagrams abound. All I really need is my own little safe space and that will be made so to the best of my abilities. And I know this. She will never be the proud owner of one of my pouches even though she loves them as others do. Too bad so sad.
I will go about my day. I will sell many bags to all others, rain or shine. Or snow. I will take my warm clothes and a thermos of hot broth so that I can be outdoors for a couple hours. I will behave as though there is nothing going on but the happy because that is the truth. Believe me, my blog is where I speak what is on my mind. That does not mean that I am not capable of wearing any face I wish at will. No one but me will know unless I wish it otherwise.
To Know. To Will. To Dare. To Be Silent. That last part will happen as soon as I do what I need to do so don’t be surprised if you hear no more on this matter.