So, I’m having a ponder. Part of me misses my blog life and part of me doesn’t. I miss some of you for sure but not the pressure to post regularly. So, I decided not to renew my customization options and this one looked like a pretty theme.

But we shall see.

I love my job!!! They love me!!! I’m getting paid well and lots of good strokes. I am the top producer in the company by a huge margin and man does it feel good to feel competent. I get a bonus every month and last month I got a bonus on my bonus. Wow!! I go to work every day, used two sick days because I was totally sick, not because I couldn’t bear to be there.

Mr. Furnace and I are fighting and trying to figure out if it’s worth saving. We are negotiating some things this weekend but it looks pretty bleak. Mostly he likes to rescue hopeless causes and I can only stand one of his fucking projects at a time and he has two right now. It’s tearing us apart. We shall see. I’m pretty fed up and while it would hurt to leave, I can totally survive this. I am too tired to fight any more and too tired to keep having to say, Hey! I need you too!!! MORE!!! No, that Damned For All This Lifetime Crack Ho you met at some free breakfast and kept running into and then let stay in your place while you were away but I couldn’t visit your house all summer is not okay. Noooo, it was my house or the mountains, neither of which was a bad thing and we had some very good times but rain is coming and I’ll be damned if I do all the fucking heavy lifting in this relationship and I’ll be damned if my only option is you not having them in your house is the best you can do for a compromise.  The constant phone calls, the blocked phone calls, the interrupted dates because some hobag got so wasted she cut her foot on glass and now you are telling your apartment manager to let her in to clean herself up?  and that??? is just the tip of tte iceberg. And why am I too tired for this? Did I tell you I am the top producer in my company, bringing in the most revenue?

Dad is still alive and wants to come home but he can’t and Mom and I are rattling around in the house really well. Our relationship has really blossomed although right now I’m tired because why? I’m the top producer in my company.

So I’m paying my bills, keeping my car, sleeping on a new bed with an amazing mattress for the first time in my life. I get very regular massages because my new insuranace pays 65% of it.

Life is pretty good. Even being mad at Mr. Furnace right now can’t squelch the fact that my life is pretty good right now. Because you know what? If it doesn’t work out with him I am pretty happy on my own.

4 thoughts on “Pondering

  1. hey long time no see! *waves* it is nice to see you update tho, even if it is just every so offten. *nods*.. and i am glad that things are going well, yay for when life is good.. *skips about*.. also like the new layout.. its pretty and with paisles.. teheh paisley but more indiviuals.. teheh

    actually i am moving in a couple of weeks so you were i my thoughs as i packed my wonder ful hares.. hmm.. i do so love them!!

    *skips about*

  2. Sounds like you’re where I was at lovely lady; deciding whether the good moments he brings are worth all the pain and battles he also brings. The sorrow far outweighed the good for me, but I wish you blessings of wisdom and clarity. You are one tough cookie and I know that no matter what happens and what choices are made, you’ll be okay –amazing even.

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