Today I had many many digital mammograms taken (gosh, 15?) and then ultrasound (boy did she look very hard and very long at one area) and finally a referral to biopsy next week and two surgeons… The surgeons may or may not be needed depending on the biopsy results. That happens next Wednesday.
Six weeks ago I found a massive lump, about the size of an Oreo cookie. I watched for a month and then went to see my doctor who told me it was good I’d already waited the month because she would have had me wait a month and watch. I do my bazoom check every month but this one wasn’t detected by the method they suggest. It was completely random and did I say BIG.
Turns out they want to biopsy the breast that I thought was still normal too… “Suspicious Calcification” was used and the radiologist made it clear she is concerned about Miss Right and suggests I have a breast surgeon look at this, perhaps in addition to the biopsy next week.
There are some forms of calcification that a radiologist can simply give you the go light on and all is well. Suspicious not so much. The good news is if this is malignant, it is probably very slow growing and so we have time to take the little fuckers out.
Right now I’m trying to breathe, get through the holidays, and a bit of distance from Mr. Furnace. We are still a couple but it’s become quite clear that we both have unfinished business that needs to be addressed and finished before he and I can move forward. I have hope for us, the love is deep and true. But I think we both need a bit of breathing space. The timing isn’t optimum but it will allow me to go into the cocoon and just rest and be quiet and take care of me. I hope he does the same, I love him so very, very much.
I feel hopeful that all will be well in all areas of my life, body, and soul. But today is a grey day and my heart feels kind of heavy right now.
I won’t be worrying about the blog or other projects much in the coming weeks but as news becomes available I’ll check in and let you all know how I’m doing.
Befriend your breasts my sisters. Check them every month. Don’t just be all clinical about them and do the step 1 step 2 bazoom check. Really get to know them so that you will notice any changes. But the step 1, 2, 3 is better than no step at all.