As I’ve mentioned before, the ex, Narcissus, got mad at me recently. Because I got mad at him. This is why I got mad at him… (I feel perfectly legit in posting this since not only did Narcissus ask this series of questions in front of several of our dear friends who knew us as a couple and who know of the breakup, some of them know my side even, but he did so on tape which was sent around the world to the subscribers of the monthly Jeshua transcripts. And he got mad at me for writing about him anonymously in my blog, he was worried that folks would think badly of him. I assure you Narcissus, I don’t need to do a thing for you to look bad, you did that well enough on your own. In this case neither he nor I are anonymous. And because of this last bit? I care no more about his reputation in my blog. Smote him. Smote his ass. If someone reading this actually knows who he is they can choose how they want to feel about it all but it is not my problem. Why? Because we established recently the readers of my blog are intelligent beings who are adult enough to make up their own minds about anything I write.)
Jeshua: Beloved songbird, how are you in this evening?
Narcissus: I’m pretty good (Good. What would you speak of?) I’m trying to figure out exactly how to ask, or actually, I’m trying to figure out what I actually want to know (That is very good to have some clarity there; it does help) There’s been something that’s kind of confused me for a number of years with a relationship. I’ve got a friend that I’ve kind of off and on had feelings for, kind of had a crush and that kind of thing, but she’s married, and so I haven’t and I won’t do anything to pursue that, but I actually had a tarot reading about it yesterday and that cleared up quite a few things. But I was just wondering what the connection between us is, where it comes from, and like who we’ve been in past lives and stuff; it’s obvious we have
Jeshua: You have, yes, and you agreed that you would meet up again in this lifetime to be friends and to know a certain ease with each other, but nothing beyond that that you need to do. But the friendship, pure and simple, is there. [snip, it is just more of the same really]
Narcissus:That’s why she’s married? That’s why I met her when she was married, so that nothing further would be allowed or anything?
Jeshua: Well, it is not so much allowed or not allowed, but it is because she has chosen to experience a relationship with someone else. Because truly, the two of you, you have experienced the whole range of emotion, and so it is not necessary that you be mates in this lifetime. But friends, yes, friends always.
This was the last lie exposed, that he DID still have feelings for her.
Knowing how very painful this was to your ex, knowing your ex reads those transcripts, knowing that instead of just reading the transcripts she might have actually been there in person as she had planned on it initially, would you have still asked these questions in front of her? Or would you have decided that while it was important to know, the tarot reading cleared it up and since the crush object is married it doesn’t really matter, and to save the ex’s feelings (you are a A Man of Honor right?) because you really did want to be friends with her, wouldn’t you have kept this out of the public and friend filled forum? Would you have made sure you didn’t say it to her face? Would you have shoved her nose right into the shit? Again? You know what? To me it proves to me that Narcissus is the most appropriate name for him. And the fucking gloves are off.
I didn’t really believe him but I assumed that while he is incredibly naive I never dreamed he was a liar. He is truly a lot of things but I never thought him to be a snake. And then I remembered he actually IS a snake. Born in 1965, year of the snake. It looked good in the beginning, snakes have very good reps, but snakes can be vain, they can think no one knows anything but them (which is of course what he accused me of and which reminds me of my cheating ex husband constantly calling ME the whore; divert their attention and they won’t see who you really are and what you are really doing divert divert divert) and they can be incredibly neurotic. OMG. How soon that would show itself.
Well, when I received that transcript in my email inbox I expected another inane question about his lifetime as Robin Hood (Jeshua told him once that he was Robin Hood. I was asked by one of the people at these Jeshua events how it felt to be “shot in the back with an arrow by Robin Hood and survive” but that’s an entirely different story) and so when I saw this I lost it. It was a total slap in the face. And I wrote him:
“Only you would try to get Jesus to tell you it was okay to steal a married woman away from her husband. Snake. Don’t ever contact me again.”
Now Narcissus is very, very bright and clever in some ways but in other ways he is not. Instead of recognizing this for the scathing sarcasm it is, he thought I meant this literally. Which really explains how impossible it was to communicate anything complex about human behavior to him. He’s just incredibly slow in this area. Several people got the exact same vibe from his questions as I did, one of them was even there. She even asked him a similar question without the sarcasm of course. She told me that she thought the same thing. And she not only is not crazy and bitchy but she loves him. The people who don’t love him? Like my friends and family. Think this was the same shitty thing to do as I do.
Like every human on the planet I make mistakes and I have misunderstood something said to me. But like every human on the earth I am also right sometimes. And in the matter of being treated abominably badly by Narcissus? In this I am right.
Two weeks after this episode he did write me. To tell me that the reason he broke up with me* was because I would say things that weren’t true. And that my snake statement wasn’t true. That I should have asked him nicely if that was what he meant and he could have replied that it wasn’t what he meant. He still didn’t get that I had no intention of being nice, that he didn’t deserve my niceness, and that he’s stupid, thoughtless, and self absorbed beyond belief.
Not so bright.
And that he at least still respects my art and that he was returning it all to me. I said that the reproduction historical clothing was also art (I am after all The Medieval Tailor) and that if he didn’t want to appear the hypocrite that he should return the handmade clothes too.
Saturday a package arrived at my doorstep. With the wolf banner (SOLD), stag bag, witch pillow, and unicorn bag. The celtic wolf pouch I made was missing (must still want to keep his medicine cards in that one) and none of the clothes were sent either (I understand snakes are very vain about their attire sometimes). I left him a voicemail telling him that he needed to return those items too.
Until I receive those last items he will be branded not only Narcissus but Hypocrite. I will retract that statement the day that the items arrive on my doorstep. When they do I will post them for sale as well.
Until this is resolved ?
Narcissus is not a man of honor, he is only when it is convenient for him. He is a hypocrite. He is a liar. He is a snake. He is history.
You are, of course, welcome to your own opinon.
*Boy does that story differ. He didn’t have the courage to break up with me. He called the day that Jean went to the hospital to tell me that he had just come home from the park where he rescued a runaway horse for its owner and that when he held out his hands for the horse to slow he realized his personal power and that he had to take two weeks off, no contact with me. The next few weeks were constant fighting and re-negoation on the length of time and the eventual bitch slap from myself to him for the final go to hell you snake from me.