with no warning phone call.

That’s that.

Final draft of my letter, don’t know how to send.  I think I need to call HPs and talk to her first then submit letter…  I’ve tried to make this as unemotional, as kind, as low key as  I possibly could.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After much contemplation I have decided to leave the coven.  I had hoped, at times, that I would come to a different conclusion and I know that HPs in particular hoped I would wait until Yule but I can not. I’m sorry. I need to move on now and don’t need this hanging over my head.

This is not simply about the incident that happened at Lammas although that plays a part in this of course. That incident has only further illuminated what I was feeling already.  I am convinced that I am not a good fit as a coven mate.  That is all I will say on that matter.

While our trad’s ritual is a beautiful thing and many times I’ve been touched by the beauty of how it manifests in the coven, in general it is not speaking to me.  I’ve mentioned this before. I’m looking for something different in my practice I know now. I’ve sought to be part of a BTW coven for over 2 decades so no one is more surprised than I to find that I was seeking something that wouldn’t fit.  But there it is.  There was no way to know this prior to initiation really. It’s an oathbound path so how could we know?  I have no regrets on that score, you all made my initiaion one of the most beautiful and meaningful of my life.  Even so, it’s not enough for me to continue. Please accept my apologies if I’ve wasted anyone’s time. I’ve learned a great deal in my time with you and am grateful for all of it.

I hope to remain on good terms with you. In my experience it’s best to make a clean break so all can find acceptance and then come back after some healing has been done to find a new way to be friends. I know that not all will want to and that’s okay. Those who do, Merry Meet, Merry Part, and Merry Meet Again!

Thank you for the love you have shown me and brightest blessings to you all!

Love,Cynthia

Got time? There’s much here for me to process…

When I was about 12 I shoplifted a book from the local grocery. Baaaaad Girl. Baaaaad Witch. What was the title you ask? Good question! The book was Diary of a Witch by Sybil Leek. It changed my life. I knew that I was one too.

That was 1971. I began my spiritual seeking at the time. I tried my parents Quaker meeting, my friend’s Baptist, Chinese Baptist, Catholicism, Buddhism, whatever I could get my hands on. I actively sought out spiritual experiences. I was so young then and I have a memory of me skipping down the street on a very sunny day on my way to church. I earned a bible at that church for reciting the 23rd Psalm from memory. It was the entire class all at once so don’t tell that I fudged it okay? I still have that bible, I’ve never read it.

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