Dyspepsia

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It’s just a little word.   It has “pep” in it and for some reason it struck me as something that I didn’t have to take too seriously.  That it  might not be that big a deal.  Certainly nothing like Celiac Disease.  Gawd. Nothing Peppy about it.

I was kinda wrong.  At least once a week my system is completely off kilter.  I feel like hurling in all directions etc, envision Train Station in Dijon (last half of post).  I called in sick Monday and here I am, at work, on Friday, worse than ever.

….. Breaking News: This just in, co-worker sick with tummy something or other.  Hmmm, maybe this is sick not dyspepsia.

It’s been quite a week.  Miss Mitty went to the dentist on Wednesday and was quite messed up by the time she got home. Which was 8:45pm because they saw her late.   She kept trying to get her land legs all night long. She wouldn’t rest until she could walk without hitting a wall, turn a circle without her back legs collapsing, jump on and off the bed with the grace of a youngster.  Which meant until at least 2am, when I was finally able to sleep through it all, she was up and down, bump, oof, up and down, oof, circle, bump, off, bump, on, circle oof, omg.

She was much better yesterday but every once in awhile she misjudged a step or two.

Me? I feel like I’ve walked into a wall or two but the one required meeting I’m supposed to be at today doesn’t start until 3:30.  Yes, a boss who is so perverse that she schedules the one weekly required core staff meeting on Fridays from 3:30 – 5:30.  What kind of nasty is that any way.  I’m seriously considering begging to go home, all day Fridays are always required, and then come back for the meeting to take minutes.  gah.

Looking for bleah cat photos and found this one.  At least it made me laugh.

Flying on a Broom – epiphany

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I was re-reading my Flying on a Broom post (it feels so good to relive that night, what can I say) and something occurred to me.  I mentioned in it three women and a dog.  And “Maiden Mother Crone” popped into my head.  We had a Maiden and we had a Mother but was I a Crone yet?

This week is special.  My entire womanly life my periods have been regular with one exception.  That one exception was the pregnancy with my son.  I have always been regular like clockwork with or without the pill.  Having had my tubes tied in 1992 I’ve been able to note that I really am regular as a Swiss clock.

Three years ago, I started peri-menopause.  Hot flashes especially and from January through March I’d havea  period every 10-14 days then back to normal.  Last year I simply began having periods every three weeks.  It’s one of the reasons I got my iron levels tested last week to make sure my exhaustion wasn’t related to anemia.  Thankfully my numbers are fine.  But still. A period every three weeks for over a year. Ghastly.  The hot flashes had ceased and that was good.  I don’t mind the being hot nearly as much as I do the fact that when I have a hot flash my brain disappears for about 5-10 minutes. Seriously can not think.

Until this month.  It’s been 5 weeks.  *5 WEEKS*  Oh thank you Lady!  It’s about time. And this week? The hot flashes are back in spades. As I said, I don’t mind them, I just notice them and fan myself a lot.  I know 5 weeks is not menopause.  But I have to say that I was dismayed that I was one whose cycles sped up instead of slowed down. It made me sad and impatient. It appears I am finally on the great slow down. WOOHOO!

I’m not really interested in menopause. I’m far more interested in menoSTOP.  While I’ll have to watch my skin and keep hydrated and make sure my lady parts are happy I can deal.  But no more horrible Oxycodone requiring cramps, no more hormone migraines, jeez, no more fuss and muss.

SO MOTE IT BE!!!!!

And there is it was, plain as day right in front of me.  I am the Crone. We were truly the triumvirate on that dark Saturn night.  The experience was so amazing I would venture to say that it was an initiation of sorts.  I’ve had a few but this is the first one that was between me and the Gods alone that I recognized as such right away.  I get to consider myself a sexy, juicy, CRONE.  And this? Makes me just so frikking happy on so many levels I am fit to burst.

Cancer This Week – True Love

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Happy Valentine Daze, Cancerian! After meditating about what advice would be most valuable for your love life in the coming months, I decided on this challenge from poet William Butler Yeats: “True love is a discipline in which each divines the secret self of the other and refuses to believe in the mere daily self.” In other words, create in your imagination a detailed picture of your loved ones at their best. Each day, make it a point to feel joy and gratitude for their most excellent beauty and power — as well as the beauty and power that are still ripening and will one day appear in full bloom.

I think this is what I always do this in the beginning. I think most of us do. It’s keeping it alive when the daily gets overwhelming that is the trick.

It’s not the first thing on my mind these days. Spring, getting a new job, my camera is breaking up and acting weird. Still stalling on projects, watching Foyle’s War a lot as the netflix come in and go out, other Brit mysteries on streaming when they aren’t here.

What I really want to do is rip out the 30 year old carpet in my bedroom (what a dust/mite/dirt magnet, yeuck) and paint the walls a lovely spring green and put up my yellow and green striped curtains from my cottage in the woods. *sigh*

What I really want to do is skip down the street singing songs (oy my knees)

What I really want to do is be Forest Grove full time… 😉

Ah well, they are the things of dreams, except perhaps the skipping down the street part. I can get there, I need to get my creaky self outside and start walking those hills again. Spring is here and it’s light until 5:30, no good excuse.

Tra la tra la.