Category Archives: Life at Work

For the record

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I have a new project. Well an old project that got put on hold due to the rioting in Kenya (seriously!) and now we are back on a timeline. The project is for the KeFA: A Kenya Free of AIDS project. I love the client (who is so incredibly active doing good stuff in the world that I get lots of work from her), I love the cause, I love the design that we hammered out, and I’m in heaven.

This is what I went back to school at 40 to do. What I moved in with my parents, at the age of 40, to do.

I love the code. I love the art. I love working on projects that matter in the world, I could never work for say, amazon or microsoft, I love being busy.

So here I am, coding up some new pages, working with style sheets, basically have a really great time.

Oh Happy Day…

Facilitated meeting finally scheduled

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I am soliciting ideas from you all… ( MAGICAL IDEAS only.  My bad, I didn’t specify… )

I’ve written up my issues and goals for resolution. I’ve sent it off for review with God’s Rottweiler. I’m registered for classes on Emotional Intelligence and Project Management and have two communication classes in the queue for Autumn. I’ve got my ducks in a row.

The meeting is scheduled for June 19th, the day after the full moon. I really want to do some kind of working the night before.

Wish list for the meeting:

  • Clearly able to communicate
  • Stay calm and don’t let him get to me, let him show his true colors without me reacting to him
  • Validation

I know that I have to let go of the outcome. I’ve irons in fires. Things are finally moving after a very sluggish spring (lovely weather predicted this weekend after the coldest spring on record since 1891). I need to have solutions to work with whether he owns his behavior and responsibility of not.

I’ve got some ideas, the first of which was creating the Blue Star button on my third eye.

What have y’all got that is positive and for the greater good? To help me stay sane while I work through this challenge?

Where am I going?

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I spent the last four days, when not wrapped up in family stuff, playing with the idea of cutting my hours at work to 90%. I figured taking every other Friday off would feel absolutely amazing… And it would. But due to some things beyond my control it’s just too much to lose financially at the moment. And that is why, I think at least to some degree, I am depressed today.

I do have new website I’m working on for a client and it feels good to be back doing what it is I love doing. Populating the eNews is so frikking boring I can’t begin to tell you how much I hate being back at administrative stuff again.

There just isn’t enough actual web work to keep me interested.

I received two emails today.

One from a local temporary head hunter outfit that is requesting my resume and portfolio. I can do that this week. They never know from one day to the next what they will have to offer so it’s a pretty risky deal… Especially since I would probably end up getting jobs that were full time for maybe six weeks, instead of regular part time work at say 15/20 hours per week.

The second email is from a friend who is a publicist working with authors. Who are evidently clamoring for websites. We were already planning on getting together this week and she informed me that she plans on talking about this a lot.

And I’m back on track considering cutting back my hours.

What I have to do this

  • The software
  • The skillz
  • The inclination
  • Great part time benefits at my current employer, full benefits in fact if I work 50% or more.

What I would need to be able to do this

  • I need to manifest a new laptop if I’m going to do this. When my old clunker at home got just too darned old I gave it away and haven’t missed having a computer at home. Not one jot.
  • I would need to manifest 40% of my post tax salary to do this, more would be better
  • Get that resume up to date
  • Courage and deep breathing exercises

I don’t think I could do option 1 and I don’t know if I would like it.  But I think that perhaps option 2 just might be possible.  Need to muse on this some more…

Breathe

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I spent the weekend pretty depressed. And in a total fibromyalgia fog. I would not have gone to metalsmithing class if it hadn’t been rivets and closures. My body ached something fierce, I was exhausted. One thing I hate about the fibromyalgia is that when it hits and I wake up in the morning, I feel hungover. Just absolutely hungover. And as one might guess, this is pretty hard to take if one is a recovering alcoholic. Headaches, body aches, brain fuzzy and not functioning in a reasoning kind of way, do not ask me to make any decisions, incapable at times.

I know this is the yuck before the sunshine. But I really hate feeling like this. I’m not sure what I should be doing. I needed a talk with God’s Rottweiler. He helped me get some clarity on what is going on with the two director’s and how I can approach the situation(s). I do feel better. He suggests I give it at least 6 months before I see any evidence of improvement. I said I didn’t need it fixed, I just needed to see that The Village Idiot was taking some personal responsibility for his behavior and failure to do the job he was hired to do. If he shows that he’s trying, I’ll give him all the support I can. We agreed that it was asking a lot.
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There’s always hope sil vous plait

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Oh. My. God/dess. Challenges, daily challenges. Regular readers know of which I speak. The Boss. Hmmm. I need a snazzy nickname for him. Similar to God’s Rottweiler.

  • Shithead
  • lizard breath
  • Dorkweasel
  • ICODC (Intellectually Challenged One Deserving Compassion)
  • Voice of Doom
  • Village Idiot

Your vote counts!

I’ve spoken with my parents about my Plan B. They were very supportive, liked my full plan, and told me of the day they both came home to tell each other they’d quit their jobs. hahahahaha. I needed that. Bad.

Plan A is to stick this out as long as possible and get them to pay for some new schooling. Talk to VI’s boss when she returns from Europe in a week and see if he is explaining things the way she intended (because he’s extremely bad at playing telegraph, he can’t pass on what he’s incapable of understanding).

Plan B from Outer Space

I quit as soon as current project is complete (I really do care about my clients), get my retirement money, get temporary and freelance webwork to keep from having to spend too much of my RM, and go back to school in the fall taking the same courses I want my current employer to pay for but be able to finish in shorter time instead of one class per quarter.

Then get back on with this employer in a different department and a new capacity.

I’ve sent out all the emails I need to send to help me decide on Plan A or B. I wait and hope he’ll swing soon.

Part of me is really intrigued with Plan B. I would get time off in between jobs and get a much better salary. Part of me would be scared not to have the security to pay my rent and car. Part of me worries about medical benefits.

ALL of me doesn’t want to work with asshats who micromanage me. I am not living in faith that this will take care of itself and that I will have victory. I might get more faith after I talk to the big kahuna. Yes, that might help a lot. Right now, I’m operating with not enough information. so can’t decide on which plan until then.

11 more days….